In fulfilment of our commitment to bringing you life-changing, critical-questions-answering book excerpts, we bring you……
“Two cannot walk together unless they be agreed”
-Amos 3:3
Once you have sorted out the issue of companionship,
then you need to be sure you are compatible.
Compatibility does not necessarily mean that both of
you are similar and exactly the same, it simply means
that both of you can get along well, it means that you
are well-suited for or attuned to each other. It doesn’t
mean that we should be the same thing, that if I have
bow legs, she must also be bow-legged, that is not
what compatibility means.
Compatibility means that we can go together; that we
are well-matched. For instance your biro and the
biro-cover are compatible, when you are not using it,
it covers the main part of the biro-head, when you
want to use the ball point, then you would cover the
tail end of the pen with the biro cover and it would still
sit there perfectly while you write, that is
compatibility. It doesn’t, like I said earlier, necessarily
mean similarity, it simply means that both of you can
fit together. You might not be the same, for instance,
my wife likes cold food, I like hot food, it shouldn’t
cause a problem.
There are two things that make people quarrel in
marriage. First, it is when they, either or both are very
selfish people and are unwilling to adjust, because no
matter who you marry, no matter how compatible you
are, there will still be need for adjustment, but if both
of you are compatible the adjustment will be very
little, it won’t be stressful. Compatibility, like we have
established doesn’t mean that you won’t have to
adjust in some areas, but if both of you are not selfish
it will be easy for you to adjust.
The second reason why people quarrel excessively is
just total incompatibility that is when the two cannot
even get along at all, even concerning the smallest
things. They don’t ever see eye to eye on any issue;
totally incompatible. Ask yourself do we get along in
basic things? What are our simple basic values? How
do we treat people? How do we see life? Do we have
similar goals in life? Genesis 2:18 says;
“And the LORD God said, it is not good that the man
should be alone. I will make him an help meet”
That word is not one word it is two put together “help
meet”. What He was saying is I will make him a helper
that is suitable and adaptable . So it is not every one
that you can get along with. Compatibility is about
your ability to get along not necessarily your
similarity. For instance, if someone is quiet it doesn’t
mean he has to marry another quiet person; no he
might need to marry someone that can talk. They will
be more compatible because it means one party will
do more listening while the other will do more of the
talking. If both of you talk a lot who will listen? If both
of you are quiet who will talk?
It is not based on similarity but rather on our ability to
meaningfully get along or fit into each other’s lives.
Marry someone that you are compatible with. It’s not
everybody you can get along with; it is not even every
Christian that you can marry.
This is culled from the book, ‘Who Should I Marry?’’ by Kingsley Okonkwo. Go grab your copies now, for yourself & loved ones. Get Over 50 free MP3 Messages by Pastors Kingsley & Mildred Okonkwo with the DOWNLOAD NOW™ eCourses such as: Kingsley Okonkwo 1.0, School Of Marriage & Relationship 1.0, 2.0, & 101, 102, 103, 201, 202, 203 Mini eCourses. Some other books by Kingsley & Mildred Okonkwo include: Who Should I Marry?, A-Z Of Marriage, When Am I Ready?, 25 Wrong Reasons People Enter Relationships, Just Us Girls, Should Ladies Propose?, I Love you But My Parents say No, God Told Me to Marry You, Waiting For Isaac, 7 Qualities Wise Men Want, 7 Questions Wise Women Ask, Chayil - The Virtuous Woman, Chayil Prayer Journal, etc.
Recommended Downloads With The DOWNLOAD NOW™
1. Why Am Still Single, by Kingsley Okonkwo
2. Who Should I Marry?, by Kingsley Okonkwo
3. Marriage Miracles, by Kingsley & Mildred Okonkwo
4. Straight Talk {1, 2 & 3}, by Kingsley Okonkwo
5. The Myth Of Singleness, by Dr. Myles Munroe
6. Kingdom Keys To Successful Relationships, by Dr. Myles Munroe
7. The 7-Star Single{1 & 2}, by Olumide Emmanuel
8. So, You Want To Marry, by Keji Ajayi
9. Common But Costly Mistakes Singles Make, by Keji Ajayi
10. Faith, Family And Finance, by Ibukun Awosika
11. The Ultimate Family - Building An Effective 21st Century Family, by Praise Fowowe
12. Dealing With Financial Abuse In Relationships, by Nimi Akinkugbe
13. Relationship Matters, by Dunamis Okunowo
14. The 12 Tests Of Love{12 TRACKS}, by Tekena Ikoko
15. Single, Or Married - Learn To Love, by Sam Adeyemi
16. Responsible Men, by Olakunle Soriyan
17. How Your Relationships Affect Your Business, by Nike Adedokun Folagbade {w/ Richard Okere}
Singles' Meeting w/ Bisi ADEWALE, by Bisi Adewale
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